Three Easy Steps to Make Real Change | WBT April 3, 2022
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WBT… About three easy steps to finally make real change.
You know how when we want to make a change in life, we usually focus on creating goals, making them SMART and having a plan for execution?
Well that’s decidedly NOT what I’m talking about here.
I still find that kind of goal setting useful but very often, especially in our personal lives, making change needs a softer approach. We can’t live every day with a drill sergeant in our head, yelling orders and documenting progress. UGH, that sounds like hell, not growth.
Life is meant to be lived and loved. We need to find ways to create the results and the change we want without the angst, the deprivation and the recrimination. Balance is key.
Some things don’t have to be all or nothing. Or now or never. Or no pain, no gain.
You need to balance your attachment to what you’ll be giving up with your desire for what life will be like when you have what you’re going after. For this process to be successful, it’s actually you that changes.
Your understanding of yourself, your desires and your limitations have to be crystal clear in the context of your intention. You have to tap into your inner world to get that and when you do, you’ll have all you need to make that change. In your own divine timing.
Here’s what to do:
Tune into you. Get present with yourself in a quiet space and get clear on what you want and why you want it. Ask (and answer) your questions and nurture your fears.
Look for the path of least resistance. Refine your intention, think through how this will affect your daily life, how to make it as easy as possible, how you’ll handle your own resistance and how to be compassionate with yourself.
Allow time, plenty of time. Remember, you’re evolving through this process. You’re becoming. This change is not at the superficial level of doing, it’s at the deep level of being. You don’t rush it, you don’t force it, you work toward it and you look back now and then to see how far you’ve come.
Here’s an example. If my intention is to spread more love, I’m going to tune into me and get clear on why I want to do that (I feel more love when I spread more love and love will change the world). Do I have doubts, do I have questions? Yes. I speak to them, I sit with them, I revisit them regularly. Next, I look for the easiest route to that. It won’t be in places or with people where I’m stressed or triggered, at least not at first. I’ll think through where and how I can do this in a way that is easy for me. And then I’ll do it (and give it time.) I’ll create habits, I’ll find new opportunities, it will get easier and I’ll get better at it. I’ll keep revisiting and tuning in. And next thing I know, I’ll be spreading love even while stressed or triggered. I don’t know how long that will take and I won’t worry about that. I will get there exactly when I should.
Now I used a fairly abstract example. Let’s choose something more tangible and potentially more measurable - exercise. Let’s say I have an intention to do some form of exercise every day. I follow the three steps. Some days I don’t exercise. Is this cause for alarm? Revisit step 1 and figure it out. If you skip a day here and there, or find yourself on a long break and don’t get back to it, find out why. And whether it’s still important to you. And how to be more consistent or restart if it is. Revisit step 2 for this. And always remember step 3.
Do you see how you change with this process? You become the person that lives the life that is truly aligned for you because you’re making the change from the inside. What do you think about that?
If you need more insight or help with the actual doing, send us your questions or challenges and we’ll be happy to share!